Jul 2010
Matt's Testimony
Cross-cultural mission involvement has impacted every member of our family. For Matt, that involvement included leading two outreach English camp teams to Hong Kong and leading a group of teens on a Youthbuilders adventure in Poland. I was along on the first Hong Kong trip in 1994, a dad privileged to follow the leadership of his son. Each evening of the camp included a fun program into which were woven testimonies of us “foreign tutors.” For some of these, Matt had interviewed the participants; on the final evening he shared his own story. The testimonies needed to be simple, brief, and easily translated; to avoid misunderstanding they were translated.
About a week ago I was surprised and blessed to come across a written version of the testimony Matt shared in Hong Kong. He had kept it along with a longer (and later) outline version of his testimony that focused on God’s grace. Twenty-four Chinese students were present. That night six of them indicated they were making a first-time commitment to Jesus Christ; another twelve indicated some other significant spiritual decision. The simple truth from transparent lives makes a powerful impact. There is for me something wonderful about hearing his testimony again, as it were, from heaven. Here is what Matt shared sixteen years ago with students in Hong Kong, and, by the grace of God, with me again last week:
Tonight you have learned a lot about the foreign tutors. I would also like to talk to you.
In high school and at university, I worked on a school newspaper writing stories about politicians, professional athletes, and university officials. Like last night, I would sit and talk with them to learn more about these important people.
Many years ago before I worked on the newspapers, I met someone who was more important than any other famous person I have talked to. His name is Jesus, and he changed my life. When I was younger, two men came to my church and shared about God. They told me that God loves me, but that I was separated from him by sin - doing things that are not right. There was a gap between God and myself. Jesus is the way to cross that gap. Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life; no one can go to the Father except by me.”
That night I invited Jesus into my life, and that changed me forever. Now when someone asks me if I have ever talked to or written about an important person, I say, “Yes – his name is Jesus, and he changed my life.”
About a week ago I was surprised and blessed to come across a written version of the testimony Matt shared in Hong Kong. He had kept it along with a longer (and later) outline version of his testimony that focused on God’s grace. Twenty-four Chinese students were present. That night six of them indicated they were making a first-time commitment to Jesus Christ; another twelve indicated some other significant spiritual decision. The simple truth from transparent lives makes a powerful impact. There is for me something wonderful about hearing his testimony again, as it were, from heaven. Here is what Matt shared sixteen years ago with students in Hong Kong, and, by the grace of God, with me again last week:
Tonight you have learned a lot about the foreign tutors. I would also like to talk to you.
In high school and at university, I worked on a school newspaper writing stories about politicians, professional athletes, and university officials. Like last night, I would sit and talk with them to learn more about these important people.
Many years ago before I worked on the newspapers, I met someone who was more important than any other famous person I have talked to. His name is Jesus, and he changed my life. When I was younger, two men came to my church and shared about God. They told me that God loves me, but that I was separated from him by sin - doing things that are not right. There was a gap between God and myself. Jesus is the way to cross that gap. Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life; no one can go to the Father except by me.”
That night I invited Jesus into my life, and that changed me forever. Now when someone asks me if I have ever talked to or written about an important person, I say, “Yes – his name is Jesus, and he changed my life.”
Comments
The Mountain
Sun 25 Jul 2010 Filed in: Reflections | AV
I was reminded of both its impressive beauty and its constancy listening to an old Dottie Rambo song that asks the question, Where do I go when the storms of life are threatening? The faith-affirming answer in the title of the song says I go to the rock of my salvation, I go to the stone that the builders rejected; I run to the mountain, and the mountain stands by me. When the earth all around me is sinking sand, on Christ the solid Rock I stand....
When it’s stormy around here (which it isn’t today), the mountain may seem to go into hiding, but it is there whether I see it or not. And if I get close enough, I’ll see it. The mountain is out, and I’m going to the Rock.
I Go the the Rock
Hidden Treasures
As we were walking by, we caught a glimpse of what looked like an old fire engine through the windows in the doors. We peered through the window and discovered it was one of several vintage fire engines inside. We eventually found a door (locked) that identified the Last Resort Fire Department, a Seattle Fire Department museum that opens for a few hours on Wednesdays and Thursdays. It was Monday, and we were out of luck. Or so we thought until a fire department official took pity on us and graciously offered to let us in for a private viewing. It is a fascinating display and an unexpected blessing.
Hidden treasures like the Last Resort Fire Department seem an appropriate metaphor for the last several days as we marked Matt’s passing with a graveside service and a barbecue. I have been blessed to hear wonderful stories of Matt’s impact. Some have brought laughter, some have brought tears; all have brought joy and made me hungry to hear more. Like a gracious fire department official who got out of his vehicle and unlocked a door, friends have opened their memories and let me in to see hidden Matt treasures worth sharing. Thank you!
Mysteries
Sun 11 Jul 2010 Filed in: Grief Notes | Reflections
For example, I don’t understand how it is that I can miss so deeply and constantly someone whom I only saw for a few weeks each year. Thirty months ago when Joan passed away, I was suddenly separated from someone with whom I had shared everything; the depth of loss was no mystery. But for the last decade, Matt has lived and ministered almost a thousand miles away. We were, at least theoretically, independent. Email and cell phones made communication easy, but days often passed without our talking or needing to. It makes no rational sense that I should miss him constantly. Love, of course, is not moderated by miles or contained by reason; still, it is a mystery that I experience without needing to understand.
The seemingly oxymoronic coexistence of sorrow and joy in our lives these days is another mystery. This one I think I can explain - at least I have tried on other occasions to explain it. But even though I know that both sorrow and joy are appropriate, sorrow because of loss and joy because of my relationship with Christ, their coexistence feels counterintuitive. It is a mystery in which I live.
I am exploring yet another mystery. Paul expresses his desire to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and fellowship of his sufferings. It seems to me that there is a mysterious connection between experiencing loss and knowing God. Perhaps it is simply a reflection of a loving God’s unwillingness to waste anything in my life; however, that grief should become a catalyst for growth is a mystery that I’m not sure I like.
Small People
Mon 05 Jul 2010 Filed in: Reflections
Carl-Henric Svanberg became famous the wrong way. He is the chairman of BP who a couple of weeks ago tripped over language and culture in saying that BP cared about the small people of the Gulf Coast. Fortunately, Svanberg is not God. I was reminded of his gaffe reading a letter written by a relative to someone else that was shared with me today. It focuses on one of the Bible’s small people:
There are way too many times in my life that I feel small and insignificant. A mere speck in the grand scheme of things, with no reason as to why I’m here, or what mark, if any, I’ll leave.
But whenever these feelings overpower me I try to remember
one of my favorite bible characters, Zacchaeus.
As the story goes this little man, Zacchaeus,
who had made himself into more than he really was,
was eager to see Jesus as he rode into Jericho.
So eager that he climbed up into a tree for a better look.
While this may have given him a birds eye view,
it probably actually hid him from Jesus as he passed.
And here’s the part of the story that I really like,
Jesus sees him,
knows who he is,
calls him by name,
and wants him
to have dinner with him.
This just blows me away every time I think of it.
So much so that
I have that phrase in the back cover of my favorite bible,
And every time I’m down (way too often),
I just flip to the back and see…
HE SEES ME,
HE KNOWS ME,
HE CALLS ME,
HE WANTS ME!
It’s great to be loved
by the one who taught us
all about it.
God doesn’t have to tell me He cares about the small people. When I think I’m small, He gently corrects me with His love. And there is indeed nothing like being loved by the God of the universe who doesn’t think you are small!
Hands
Sun 04 Jul 2010 Filed in: Grief Notes | Reflections
It was the right place to be, but I almost didn’t go. Did I want to expose the fresh wounds of grief? (Not particularly.) Could I experience the words and music of worship without creating a puddle of tears? (Probably not. Thank God for Kleenex in every row; I have trouble making it through communion dry-eyed even when life is normal.) Did I want to worship? (More strongly than usual; I wanted to do what Matt was doing.) So I went to church this morning even though I didn’t have to. And I’m glad I did.
God is worthy of whatever worship I can give Him, and my fellow-worshipers help me handle the handicap of grief. It was not just handshakes and hugs before and after the service, it was hands during the service as well. Amazing grace... my heart was too full to sing aloud, and my leaking eyes were closed in prayer when I felt the hands of others on my shoulders. I’ll take your burden, you take My grace... There are times when I need to be alone; this morning was not one of them. Their hands said what my heart needed to hear.
It is of grace that God should delight in what broken worshipers can offer. This morning, this broken worshiper was blessed to be helped by the hands of others.
God is worthy of whatever worship I can give Him, and my fellow-worshipers help me handle the handicap of grief. It was not just handshakes and hugs before and after the service, it was hands during the service as well. Amazing grace... my heart was too full to sing aloud, and my leaking eyes were closed in prayer when I felt the hands of others on my shoulders. I’ll take your burden, you take My grace... There are times when I need to be alone; this morning was not one of them. Their hands said what my heart needed to hear.
It is of grace that God should delight in what broken worshipers can offer. This morning, this broken worshiper was blessed to be helped by the hands of others.